Posts
The Tale of the Two Bitchies (Second Bitch)
Day: More Than Just Another Day
Weather: Lightning Storm
When the two most powerful bitches in the universe cross fire, you know the dark times are here.
“Alice the Thunderland”, the powerful bitch with a twisted smile raised her pen and started scribbling her spell on the whiteboard. The timeline of her march to the white tower “So Eva, I noticed that recently your long overdue project had made some significant progress”.
Eva shot a spark of energy from the corner of her eye and breathed a sentence of authority “Yes, aaas you noticed. Under my expert guidance, Aaai had taken this project to new grounds. Eeeverything is going fine under myyyy leadership. “
Alice deflected the attack with a twinkling of her thickly mascara’d lashes. A perfect defense exhibited. “Oh really? I wonder what dragged you behind six months ago then? Anyway, we don’t talk about the past. I only care about the future. Can you give me a new completion date on this? I’ll need to log it. Just to make sure things are delivered on time this time”. A shower of meteorites shot from her expensive diamond ring powered by the artificial lighting above rained down on Eva.
Eva dodged the offense skillfully by moving towards the white board in a liquid smooth manner, picked up a red marker and started defacing the timeline spell. A skillful move that even the most experienced Time Lord will have difficulty to counter. “Aaaas you know. The Library doesn’t wooork according to your timeline. We do understaaand on a graaaander scale you might need to know the progress, but when we are reeeeady we will let you know. As an ex-librarian, you should be the first person in your office to understaaaaand the complexity of the project. The research, the indexing, the data entry, the design of the user interface, they all require a lot of expertise from us to work on them.”
Alice seemed to have already predicted the move though. She summoned the Titans immediately. “You know what? I had a chat with Sonia (my boss) and Peter (the Dean of University Research Office). They seemed to expect that this could be finished by the end of the year. I am sure they have both communicated to you on that?” Eva took her tome out from her folder and ready to deflect, however, Alice was much quicker. She slightly moved her position ready to dodge and mumbled a few words to Claire and me. “I know you two are kinda new to the project, but with your involvement so far, do you agree with Sonia’s view?”
Claire and I looked at each other, hoping that our rubber raincoat could keep us alive from this attack on our innocent souls. However, it was a Class A puppet spell! Nothing had prepared us for that! We saw the puppet strings descending on us from thin air and we were defenseless. “What would they know? They are just working on things Aaaaai assigned to them. Aaaaai am the person in charge, so if you waaaant to know the full picture, Aaaai am the best person to ask.” The abrupt lighting storms from Eva formed an electrical shield above us. Though it looked like it’s an attempt to protect us from the puppet strings, the electrical shield could burn us to ashes to if we were not wearing our rubber raincoat.
At this point Claire started to draw her own spells on her notebook. A series of short hand notes that she and I invented to communicate without Eva’s understanding, not to mention Alice.
“When the hell would these two bitches be done?” She wrote in her cryptic spell. “How the hell would I know?” I replied. We felt trapped without Sonia the High Cleric and Valkyrie to protect us this time round.
Alice, as experienced as she is, obviously noticed our spell casting. “Oh I’m glad that someone is taking notes for the meeting. Looks like we finally have two pairs of good hands for this project.” We may be novel to the game, but apparently unconventional homemade spells helped us survived one of the epic battles in the meeting room.
The day ended with Alice slightly scratching Eva. But we knew Eva will not be licking her wounds for long and will be back in good shape for the next fight very soon. But for Claire and I, we had the next few days completely Eva-free and managed to do some work. It might not be a happily ever after situation, but at least the “Bitch of the Second Floor” is gone for a while.
As for me, I applied every single tactic and psychology I observed from Alice and Eva at my gay bitch audition. It was not flawless, but two days later I got a call from Hugo that I got the job.
Maybe like everything else, if you look close enough you can find some good in this job.
No comments:
Post a Comment